I’ve really been enjoying Substack since I moved over; it feels nourishing and positive in a way that the internet hasn’t felt for me in a long time.
Tavi Gevinson joined! Back when I worked in the office at a sofa factory in Melksham, I spent a lot of time reading her blog “Style Rookie”. She was super young when she started that but it was consistently great! I really liked this quote from her first Substack post (which is here) :
“I didn’t always see what I did as writing or photography because the internet was so new and everything online seemed to me like a less serious, too-novel version of art-making that came before.
I think I was wrong—I wrote and took photos, even every day for some stretches—but I also think not seeing these hobbies as Writing or Photography is part of why I was able to do them. It took some pressure off.”
This really resonates. Let’s all take the pressure off and just… enjoy doing the things that we enjoy! When I was a kid and even not SO long ago, I used to write all the time just because it felt good. I even used to share my writing online regularly and not worry about it at all. I think the internet used to feel a lot more anonymous so that helped or maybe it’s just a normal part of getting older, becoming more guarded.
I don’t know.
But I like the feeling of committing to sharing something every single week. Taking time to write these bi-weekly emails to you and then something extra for my paid subscribers on the weeks in between (so far including a demo version of my song “Golden” and a collection of haikus and drawings that were initially released as a very limited edition handmade book) feels really fun and has been allowing/forcing me to think about things in a different way. .
It has also made two weeks seem like a very long time that has somehow come around really quickly.
Since we last spoke, I went to see Rocky Horror Show in the flesh for the first time!
When I was in secondary school, I became obsessed with that movie. Obsessed to the point where I had, for some reason, carried the VHS around with me in my backpack on a business studies trip to Birmingham.
On the way home I noticed the little square TV monitor and VCR calling to me from the front of the coach and seeing an opportunity, I asked the Mr Malough if I could put a film on. “Hmm…What film?”
I presented him with the video and his face lit up - he was a fan too! He examined the case - rated 15. Scanning the rows, Mr M weighed up his options; be held responsible for a few fourteen year olds witnessing Tim Curry in suspenders or be subjected to a busload of bored Year 10s shouting and throwing bottles at each other for the duration of the journey. It was a no-brainer. “Yes, I think it’ll be alright”.
He popped the cartridge in and in that moment, I felt like a fucking goddess.
Oh, you all think I’m ‘weird’ do you? Well for the next 1 hour and 40 minutes you’re trapped in MY world as we traverse the M5 together! “How ‘bout that!” indeed.
RHPS was filed alongside Hedwig and the Angry Inch and Velvet Goldmine as part of my teenage education on gender, sexuality, music and self expression; I found them profoundly exciting and empowering. They were hugely influential to me.
From them, I took the message that it’s ok to be the person that you want to be. Ok to be the person that you are. That in fact, this is the key to finding the people you want to find and unlocking a life that is beautiful and thrilling.
That can be easy to forget and hard to remember - not to mention that for many people the act of being truly yourself can be downright dangerous.
I went with Eleanor, one of my oldest friends. She’d been several times before and I totally understand why people keep going back for more. I was having huge amounts of fun before the performance even started! Standing outside the Wyvern in Swindon with all of those people dressed up, arses on display and everybody being just lovely to one another - it was a wonderful thing.
I could feel how much this shared experience of being a fan of this particular piece of work meant to everybody who was there but on top of that, everyone was… playing. Why is that such a rarity? Why do we forget that we need to play?! I want to play more and have fun and express myself honestly and - like I said in my last email - make time to do the things that make me me.
One of the last songs in the show is Frank N Furter singing “Don’t Dream It - Be It”.
The amazing Laverne Cox (who played the role of Frank N Furter in the remake) said
“The song ‘Don’t Dream It, Be It’ when I discovered the film in college became a personal mantra of mine.1”
That song and those words have been in my head since that night.
(The “it” I want to be right now… Playful and relaxed. Honest and kind. Healthy and energised.)
Other stuff that’s been going on …
My husband Jim’s band Get The Blessing released the second single from their forthcoming album :
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Been feeling pretty rough all week, but going with the flow and allowing rest without guilt, making better choices - even managed to do a 30 minute workout for the first time in since February!
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Been in the studio with Thought Forms
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Enjoying these guys, as always
Til next time…
Thank you for reading!
x Charlie
I'm so glad that you're starting to feel a little better now. I wanted to comment on your previous post but work, errands and other Real Life stuff got in the way. I just want to say congrats for getting back on stage, and I'm so sorry to hear that your health problems had held you back for so long. I'm still annoyed at myself for missing you guys on the last time you played in my city...not just because of the tunes, but because you're all really cool people. If this is your new outlet while you heal, re-adjust or find some new way to express yourself, then I'm here for it. Take care! [hugs]
Beautiful, Charlie xo