We met with Phil after my book came out. It wasn't practical for him to join us getting together for a reunion gig. So we found bass and keyboards players, got around sixteen tracks up to scratch, and played at the Cons Club in town in November 2012. We were pencilled in for PITP 2013 plus gigs in the Nose and back at the Cons, but it didn't materialise. That was why I started writing thrillers!
Facing your fears can be therapeutic. I hope you can get on stage again soon. I'd do it in a heartbeat. The itch doesn't leave you even when you're almost 80.
Hey Charlie, this really hits home, especially the paragraph about identity and purpose.
I'm into my 17th month of Long Covid/CFS/ME and literally had my 1st covid symptoms in a studio, talking to the engineer about arrangements, preparing to record an EP that weekend with my old band who had got together remotely during lockdown and had written a bunch of new songs. We had just played our first gig together this century. I wasn't feeling too good and was desperately hoping it was hay fever, but of course it wasn't.
The EP didn't get recorded, the release gig was cancelled, if I'm lucky I can play around 45 minutes on a "good day". On the bass, because since Covid I can't stand playing guitar, which was my main instrument, go figure. Maybe it's to do with frequencies, I have no idea, though to be honest I was already getting lower, playing baritones or tuning to C#.
And now I question my identity and will I ever play another gig? I can play the instruments but can't create anything new. So I'm practically in tears reading this, the glimmer of hope it gives, the possibility, the "if Charlie can do it, maybe one day I'll be able to too". Thanks so much for this post and your honesty, I know how hard it is to talk about the illness and how nobody really understands.
Hey - wow, thank you so much for replying to this. Now you've got me in tears!
I'm really sorry to hear you've been going all of that, it's completely crap and it feels so isolating because if people haven't experienced it then it's really hard for them to understand.
It's so much more than just "feeling a bit tired", won't be cured by "taking it easy" and like you say, makes you question your whole identity!
I really deliberated about sharing this and it took me over a week to write it because it felt so hard to say - we get so used to not being "believed" or not having the proper words to describe it. I worry that I'm boring when the answer to "how are you" is always the same. I feel guilty complaining because I haven't got "XYZ serious illness" yet when it affects your life in every way so negatively - it is pretty serious! So thank you for sharing with me, I really appreciate it. Always here if you want to talk about it - I got referred to an NHS support group thing over zoom which was quite helpful mostly because there were other people who understood!
Maybe most people will never understand the guts it took you to get up on that stage, or to post about it, but I do. I just don't make plans anymore because I can never be sure I'll be able to go through with them.
This is frankly the most inspiring thing I've read in 17 months, I've read about many people overcoming their illness to do things, but this one is the most specific to my particular situation. You've articulated it so perfectly.
Looking forward to the day I can see you playing at a gig!
We met with Phil after my book came out. It wasn't practical for him to join us getting together for a reunion gig. So we found bass and keyboards players, got around sixteen tracks up to scratch, and played at the Cons Club in town in November 2012. We were pencilled in for PITP 2013 plus gigs in the Nose and back at the Cons, but it didn't materialise. That was why I started writing thrillers!
❤️
Facing your fears can be therapeutic. I hope you can get on stage again soon. I'd do it in a heartbeat. The itch doesn't leave you even when you're almost 80.
Did you play a few years back or am I mistaken?
Hey Charlie, this really hits home, especially the paragraph about identity and purpose.
I'm into my 17th month of Long Covid/CFS/ME and literally had my 1st covid symptoms in a studio, talking to the engineer about arrangements, preparing to record an EP that weekend with my old band who had got together remotely during lockdown and had written a bunch of new songs. We had just played our first gig together this century. I wasn't feeling too good and was desperately hoping it was hay fever, but of course it wasn't.
The EP didn't get recorded, the release gig was cancelled, if I'm lucky I can play around 45 minutes on a "good day". On the bass, because since Covid I can't stand playing guitar, which was my main instrument, go figure. Maybe it's to do with frequencies, I have no idea, though to be honest I was already getting lower, playing baritones or tuning to C#.
And now I question my identity and will I ever play another gig? I can play the instruments but can't create anything new. So I'm practically in tears reading this, the glimmer of hope it gives, the possibility, the "if Charlie can do it, maybe one day I'll be able to too". Thanks so much for this post and your honesty, I know how hard it is to talk about the illness and how nobody really understands.
Hey - wow, thank you so much for replying to this. Now you've got me in tears!
I'm really sorry to hear you've been going all of that, it's completely crap and it feels so isolating because if people haven't experienced it then it's really hard for them to understand.
It's so much more than just "feeling a bit tired", won't be cured by "taking it easy" and like you say, makes you question your whole identity!
I really deliberated about sharing this and it took me over a week to write it because it felt so hard to say - we get so used to not being "believed" or not having the proper words to describe it. I worry that I'm boring when the answer to "how are you" is always the same. I feel guilty complaining because I haven't got "XYZ serious illness" yet when it affects your life in every way so negatively - it is pretty serious! So thank you for sharing with me, I really appreciate it. Always here if you want to talk about it - I got referred to an NHS support group thing over zoom which was quite helpful mostly because there were other people who understood!
Lots of love to you and thank you so much. x
Maybe most people will never understand the guts it took you to get up on that stage, or to post about it, but I do. I just don't make plans anymore because I can never be sure I'll be able to go through with them.
This is frankly the most inspiring thing I've read in 17 months, I've read about many people overcoming their illness to do things, but this one is the most specific to my particular situation. You've articulated it so perfectly.
Looking forward to the day I can see you playing at a gig!